Kicking off our alphabet with probably my most favourite and most important part of self-love…authenticity. On my own self-love journey for the past 3 years, authenticity has been the absolute game changer for me. From someone who was afraid to be herself for fear of what others might think, someone who just tried to go along and fit in with other people, and someone who kept her real self locked-up inside. Growing into someone who is unapologetically authentic, someone who isn’t afraid to be herself and doesn’t care what other people think, and someone who has unleashed her real self to be free. And boy, does it feel good!
It can be really easy in today’s society to just fit into a box that tells you how you are supposed to live your life and who you are supposed to be. But honestly, it’s the biggest disservice we could ever give ourselves. We need to stop fitting into this box, and create our own damn box! (Mine would be purple and sparkly with enough room for all my friends and family!) I truly believe that the world would be a happier and safer place if we all just stopped following the crowd and lived our lives according to our authentic selves. When I wasn’t being authentic, I was miserable, I was depressed and I was super negative and pessimistic about life. Because I was constantly depriving and shutting down that little authentic voice inside of me. It’s only once I decided to let that voice be free, that I became a happier, more positive and optimistic person.
I can’t tell you how empowering it feels to own your choices, to say no to things that aren’t serving you and to let your freak flag wave for all to see! There were parts of myself I used to hide away from the world, for fear of being judged – my jiggly belly, my face without make-up, my love of musical theatre, my obsession with the royal family, my 90s-pop taste in music, my down days, my wins, my jealousy, my humour, my chattiness, my anxiety. But these are all things which make me the awesome human being I am today.
So, come join me over here on the authentic side of the fence, I can honestly say it will make you feel happier, more connected and the most like YOU, you have ever felt!
Here are my top 5 tips for living as your authentic self:
1. Get really clear on who you are through self-study. Live life curiously and observe your thoughts, patterns and behaviours. Explore what you like and what you don’t like in all areas of your live and then own those choices.
2. When making choices, no matter how difficult, always ask yourself What would authentic me do in this situation? Don’t make choices based on what someone else wants, always make sure the choice comes from you.
3. Always listen to your intuition. That gut feeling, that part of you deep down who knows exactly what to do. What would she say in this situation? Listen to her. Always. She’s got your back!
4. Do something you love EVERY SINGLE DAY. Something that isn’t work related, something that you love to do just for the fun of it. Something creative that sparks joy. It could be a two-minute dance party for one in your bedroom or a two-hour painting session, just letting your imagination run wild. Do it because you love it.
5. Say no to anything that doesn’t align with who you are and your values. Ahh, the best word in your authentic alphabet – NO. Saying no to anything that doesn’t serve you, be it plans with friends, job opportunities or simple daily tasks around the home, can be the most empowering and liberating part of self-love. If you find it hard to say no to people, I like to use the wording “Sorry, I’m not available for that”. That way, you aren’t lying or making up an excuse (not very authentic) and instead stating that energetically and authentically you are not available for whatever it is being asked of you.